Kay. So, today, while I was in gym, we were playing dodgeball, and I was out, and standing on the sides. The post that holds the volleyball net was on my left, and I was just standing by it, not touching it. Since I'm out, I'm allowed to toss the ball to teammates. So. A ball is rolling towards me, and I have to grab it before the other team does, so I rush forward, and:
Riiiiiiiiiip. That's the sound of my pants ripping from the beginning of my thigh to two inches below my knee.
It was caught on this nubbin thing that you wrap the excess rope around.
I was not even touching the post.
So. I went and taped up my pants with masking tape, until my mom could get there with another pair. These were my new pants. Irk.
Also: This was the day I had to pee in a cup. I'm glad that I had the forsight to remove my jewellry from the hand I was using. Now I truly understand penis envy: as a felt it when I PISSED ON MY HAND, as a result of not having the proper equipment to aim with.
I love giving you kids all the details.